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four, and back to attachment to God in stages relationships from an attachment perspective
five and six? – and very fruitfully so (see Brown & Elliott,
2016; Costello, 2013; Gillath, Karantzas & Fra-
2. The parallels between stages / styles of at- ley, 2016; Johnson, 2018; Mikulincer & Shaver,
tachment on the one hand, and ways of relating 2016; Ogden & Fisher, 2015 – to mention just a
to God on the other hand, are assumptions by few very relevant books).
the author. Although interesting and likely qui- This topic of adult attachment goes far beyond
te important, they do not seem to be based on supposing that it’s all about a fixed attachment
any research, case studies or previous literatu- style which ‘depends on’ childhood experience,
re. I’m sure Kondratyk’s explorations could find which is ‘decisive in’ behavior and attitude to-
support and further inspiration in, for example, wards an adult partner, and necessitates the ‘full
Clinton and Straub (2010). satisfaction’ of childhood attachment needs.
It’s not that linear and surely not that absolu-
3. There is so much more to discover about at- te. Adult attachment is much more dynamic.
tachment and religion/spirituality. The wider That’s what emotions in adult relationships are
view by Granqvist (2020) could be instructive. all about: they point powerfully to deep adult
For example, the well-established correspon- attachment needs, hurts and joys.
dence / compensation hypothesis shows that at- To be sure, insecure childhood attachment is
tachment and spirituality do not necessarily de- the basis for a multitude of problems: psycho-
velop correspondingly. Compensating spiritual pathology, conflict and estrangement, and pos-
relating is also possible, which is what might sibly difficulties in relating to God. But it is also
be happening when sudden conversion occurs; true that ongoing adolescent and adult attach-
or when avoidant people compensate their in- ment dynamics can, on the negative side, lead
terpersonal attachment avoidance by fervently to attachment trauma – and on the positive side,
seeking God, for instance through prayer, and engender healthy functioning in adolescents
thus experiencing Him as very close. and adults. Thinking about childhood attach-
ment is usually about the early years, the first
4. In order to put human-human versus human- five or so. And of course they are fundamental.
divine analogies into perspective, it would also But attachment development in adolescence is
be of interest to explore in which ways attach- no less important, for better of worse (Kerns, &
ment to God differs from interhuman attach- Brumariu, 2016) and what has gone wrong ear-
ment relationships. lier on can still be – or become - open to repair
(Brown & Elliott, 2016; Cozolino, 2014; John-
Now I want to turn to one more general but main son, 2018).
point of criticism, which concerns something So, what I miss most in Kondratyk’s article, is
foundational that seems to be missing. From the a perspective on attachment dynamics remai-
onset the article states that attachment theory is ning important throughout the lifespan of fo-
a theory of child development. But it’s not. As rever-relational human beings, and the ongoing
Kondratyk’s definition states nicely, attachment possibility to repair attachment insecurity and
is about ‘emotional connection […] in time and disorder through adolescence and adulthood.
space’ – which involves interhuman relating Even if attachment in early childhood has beco-
throughout the lifespan. Both attachment pro- me insecure in one of the three mentioned ways
cesses and attachment theory do begin in child- (ambivalent, avoidant or disorganized), correc-
hood. But since Bowlby and Ainsworth, attach- tive emotional experiences can redirect attach-
ment theory has ‘become adult’; it is now seen ment development and form a more secure base.
to encompass the full human lifespan and run These corrective experiences can come about
though en breadth of interpersonal relation- through, for example, new attachment experi-
ships, not just mainly the child-caregiver rela- ences in adolescent or adult relationships (Tro-
tionship . A lot of research and clinical practice nick & Gold, 2020); through conversion which
pays attention to adult functioning and couples establishes a vitalizing relationship with God

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