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Self (2012), she expresses one of her cen- the skills necessary to accomplish it advan-
tral concerns: “how the authenticity of the ce in strength and efficacy. Developing and
self, the ability to act in accord with one‘s maintaining false self behavior is maladap-
true inner self, can become compromised tive in the long run, promoting narcissism,
over the course of development.” and anxiety and unhappiness will plague in-
The self is both a cognitive and social con- dividuals who eschew authenticity for the
struction, in which the picture people form sake of covering their deficiencies.
of themselves is a product of their own On the other hand, if parents (and others)
thinking and others’ influence. On the one accurately mirror their child’s experience
hand, forming a self-theory requires certain and support their authentic self-represen-
cognitive capabilities or I-self processes tations throughout the life stages, then the
that develop with age, and these “cogniti- true self will be confirmed and strengthe-
ve-developmental antecedents” of the self ned, resulting in a firm sense of authenti-
make it possible for one to form self-repre- city, optimal self-esteem (based on reality
sentations and attain an overall conceptua- not illusion), the pursuit of self-determined
lization of the self. On the other hand, how goals, genuineness and honesty in close re-
one describes and evaluates oneself is also lationships, and happiness.
a product of “socialization experiences” Therapy that promotes the true self will
that “influence the particular content and meet patients at their developmental sta-
valence of one’s self-representations.” ge. For example, for very young children,
The normative or ideal impact of socializa- since their perceptions (however inaccura-
tion experiences would be to support the te) are true for them, parents should vali-
self-representations that a child or ado- date and respect the child’s experience as
lescent feels truly define him or her. he or she perceives it rather than trying to
Harter’s work elucidates the differences in reject or replace it. Parents should afford
self-representations that occur as people children a central participatory role in tel-
develop through various life stages. Eve- ling about their experience and using their
ry stage can be understood as a cognitive voice, so as to promote their becoming “in-
advance upon those before because of an strumental authors of their own true life
increasing ability to generalize or abstract stories” (Harter 2002).
out from previous self-descriptions and In order to have confidence in their true
self-evaluations. self and to cement their authenticity, child-
Ideally these advances, aided by social ex- ren and adolescents need their parents to
periences that support an authentic sense validate them through listening, allowing
of self, will result in firmer self-coherence their children to use and strengthen their
and more accurate self-descriptions and own “voice.” At the same time, caregivers
self-evaluations, enabling psychological shouldn’t merely allow children to do or
health and well-being. However, if our in- believe whatever they please. For ado-
fluential figures (e.g., parents) refuse to lescents who have the ability to accurately
affirm the self we think we are, we will compare their performance with objective
attempt to reconstrue the self into a form standards, caregivers should corroborate
that does win affirmation, but at the cost of the accurate self-assessments teenagers
our sense of authenticity. make, rather than piling on praise to build
In the course of pyschological development, up inflated self-esteem.
both the motive for false self behavior and For adults, Harter warns against a preoc-
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