Page 135 - EMCAPP-Journal No. 5

A Portrait of a Christian Psychologist: Paul C. Vitz

Some of the appeal of the idea of self-forgiveness which is reduced through the work of reparati-
comes from non-religious psychologists and on: the infant in fantasy and in interaction with
clients aware of the benefits of forgiveness but the mother attempts to repair and thus make up
who cannot accept God or God’s forgiveness. for or remedy the earlier anger and hatred. In a
In addition, since the injured party is often un- similar manner, this very primitive defense me-
available the self apparently is the only remai- chanism becomes, within the self-forgiveness
ning option as a forgiver (Vitz, 1999). However, model, an encouraged defense mechanism.
the most common advocates of self-forgiveness That is, the client is encouraged to separate the
are religious psychologists many of whose in- “bad” transgressor self from the “good” victim/
terpretations will be addressed below. In any bystander self since one part of the self must
case, self-forgiveness is a very recent concept forgive another part.
with only modest psychological and little or no However, as many psychotherapists have obser-
theological justification. ved, a fragmented ego set up by infantile split-
ting can sometimes remain unresolved, resul-
Difficulties with the Self-forgiveness Model ting in a serious kind of arrested development
(Masterson, 1988, p. 78). The split representati-
Splitting on of the self and others can lead to personality
The self-forgiveness model leads clients to split disorders, including Narcissism and Borderline
themselves into a good self that does the forgi- Disorders (Masterson, 1988). Thus, rather than
ving and a bad self that needs to be forgiven. encouraging maintenance of the split, helping
Let us briefly recall what splitting is and why en- clients to overcome such splitting through re-
couraging may be dangerous from a therapeutic integration and self-acceptance, is usually the
perspective. Object relations’ theorists describe work of therapy.
splitting in infantile development where the in- A paradox, therefore, seems to develop within
fant works to reconcile the bad and the good the self-forgiveness model. Clients are encou-
internal representations of its mother. After ha- raged to split themselves such that the “good”
ving idealized the mother, splitting becomes a self forgives the “bad” self, revealing that the
defense mechanism in the infant upon discove- “bad” is accepted, even if the injustice com-
ry that mother is not perfect. Splitting protects mitted is not accepted. “One self feels despised
the “good” internalized object from the revela- and rejected by the other. We are exiled from
tion of the “bad” in her. Subsequent to splitting our own selves, which is no way to live….forgi-
the representation of the mother, the infant also ving ourselves is the only way we heal the split”
must split the self since the infant self identifies (Smedes, 1996, p. 96). This proposed self-for-
closely with the mother (e. g. Klein, 1946/1975). giveness occurs through the work of reparati-
That is, the internal representation of the infant’s on, such as that described by Klein in regard to
good self is constructed from the good experi- infantile splitting. There is an implicit claim
ences with the good mother, and the bad self that the “good” in the self can forgive the “bad”,
from the bad experiences initiated by the bad if the “bad” self works to make reparation to the
mother. Thus, the self is also split in its earliest “good”. Reparation for the injustice becomes a
representation. means to heal the split.
Such splitting can be healthy provided the in- One may, however, wonder exactly how re-
fant does not remain fixed at that stage. The integration can occur between two parts of a
child will need to integrate the two internal broken whole. We propose that rather than
objects into a whole, which represents the mo- self-forgiveness becoming the missing “glue”
ther –and the self in a realistic fashion as both for human healing, it can instead paradoxical-
good and bad. This integration makes the in- ly become the solvent which prevents cohesi-
fant aware that the anger directed toward the on. There are four proposed healing aspects to
bad mother was also directed at the good mo- self-forgiving which are said to explain its ef-
ther since they are now recognized as the same. fectiveness. These four are the client’s ability: a)
This fusion creates remorse or primitive guilt to make self-reparation; b) to reintegrate after

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